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A handful of Very Hilarious Bar Jokes

By: Peter Rix

There is something as regards bars with drunks that appear to be the commonest cause of jokes. Everyone knows a comic story that begins "A guy walks into a bar" (and says Ouch!) and there's no doubt that drunks tend to be exceedingly amusing. Therefore here are a couple different pub jokes that you may not have heard previously, however these are all extremely funny, I promise you!

THE CRAZY BET WITH THE BARMAN
A man walks up to the bartender and states, "Do you observe that glass over there in the corner? I am going to wager you £50 that I can pee inside it from here!" The bartender concurs, since the glass is miles way over on the other section of the bar.

As a result the man unzips and whips it out, then pisses in a million diverse directions, coming nowhere even near to the shot glass. In the meantime the barman is laughing so hard he can just about breathe.

"Pay up," says the barman, and cheerfully takes the money.
Meanwhile the gentleman pays up, and walks over and demands £200 from a third chap playing pool.

The barman calls him back then demands, "Why did that chap hand over you the money?"

And the first chap says, "'Cause I bet him £200 that I could piss all over your pub and you would merely laugh about it!"

SEXY LADY IN A QUIET LOCAL BAR
A very delightful woman goes up to the bar in a quiet local pub.

She gestures alluringly in the direction of the barman, who comes over straight away. After he arrives, she seductively signals for him to bring his face near to hers. As soon as he does so, she begins to softly caress his beard, which is full and bushy.

"Are you the manager?" she purrs, gently stroking his face with both hands.

"Actually, no" he replies.

"Can you get him for me -- I have to to talk to him." She is running her fingers up further than his beard and into his hair.

"I'm afraid that I can't," breathes the bartender, noticeably aroused. "Is there something I can do?"

"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his lips and allowing him to suck them gently.

"Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room."

THE GUINNESS BOSS AT THE BEER CONFERENCE
After the Great British Beer Festival, in London, all the global brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.

The guy from Corona sits down and pronounces, "Hey Senor, I would like the world's finest beer, a Corona." The barman dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.

The gentleman from Budweiser affirms, "I'd like the finest beer in the world, give me 'The Queen Of Beers', a Budweiser." The barman gives him one.

The gentleman from Coors says, "I'd like the solitary beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, present me a Coors." He takes it.
The man from Guinness sits down and pronounces, "Give me an orange juice."

The bartender is a little shocked, but supplies him what he ordered.

The other brewery presidents glare over at him and inquire "Why aren't you having a Guinness?" and the Guinness president replies: "Well, I guess if you guys are having weak drinks, then so will I."

Article Source: http://casinoarticles.us

My name is Pat McLachlan, and I have a Home Brewing website and another for Online Jokes! So this article is perfect to promote both websites!

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