Books and Birds

If you did not have a slovenly mummy like Dodge, or your old man didn't work in the chip shop like Daz and Skinny's, then getting out on a mid-winter evening took all of the cunning the Cows Gate Gang could mobilize. Milky White of course was free to Hush pup as he pleased in the dark, only he preferred to stay inside doing his science homework or banging his triangle. Wormhole had to remain in the warm if there was a mist, apparently, because it rusted the metal plate in his head. There was a collection box for him down at the chapel so the Wormholes could send him to a private garage to have it galvanized.
Then Daz said he saw Milky 2 times coming home from the library in the dark at 6.30.
-What, I said. With books ?
-Nah, wiv an 'orse under 'is arms
-Nay lad, I claimed, just like Milky would've.
-Yeah, Daz asserted. 'F your old lady will not let you out to play, then join the library. Then, right, just say you 'ave to take 'em back or Ena Sharples'll fine yer.

It was alright for Daz. His mum sent him up the chipshop constantly to fetch their suppers and thin went to help him carry it. Dodge was out ferretting with his pop or doing rag & bone. But me, I used to be a caged under the we-want-you-where-we-can-see-you principle. Dark is dark, and in the dark boys get up to mullarky. So I joined the library, and the cage door opened one night a week.

The issue was what to do with the books. Obviously we were unable to read them. Ena Sharples never expected me to either.
-You ! She said when I walked in. This is not the chip shop, Cedric. It's a public library.
The library was in the old fire station so it was only as big as a hamlet fire-engine. Ena Sharples was at a desk in the middle where once there'd have been a pool of oil and sawdust. Right place for her too, face like that. Her James was at the grammar school so she looked at me like the firemens' pole was still stuck up her nose.
-I do not wish to find jam sandwiches squashed within the pages when you bring these back
Daz was waiting outside.
-Well, you were given me one ?
-Yeah yep, I got us one each.
-That one's no good, yer cory !
-I'm going to look at that one. It's Jack Hargreaves. 'S got fishin' pictures in it. The other two's foryou know what.
We were given to the pinnacle of the concrete slope. I handed Daz his book, the second largest in the library, a good 2ft square : Ships of the Earth. Mine was far larger : Greeks and Trojans. Conditions were good. A light frost on the nobbly concrete, a chill mist muffling the streetlamps. We put the books on the ground, spine forwards and sat on them, tucking our fingers under the flaps. The 1st couple of yards we were like dogs with itchy bums, scooting ourselves with our heels until we hit the frost and down we went on our bobsleigh books, grinding to a halt on the pavement grit at the bottom, bobble hats askew.

We were making our way back up the slope for a second run when Milky White came out of his backdoor and started to make his way up the cinder path.
-'E prob'ly saw us, I announced. Wouldn't put it past 'im to split on us to Ena.
-Let him, Daz claimed, always the realist. She'll find out anyhow, the state of this book.
He held up his Ships of the planet. Looked like Shipwrecks of the planet now, huge graze down to the bare cardboard underneath. I was thinking I had two weeks to fix it with, I don't know, some paint, or I could stick on another picture, when this voice came down the drainpipe. Well, it came from above, the open window of the closest house, Milky's neighbor :
-You're in difficulty now Flower Petal.
Daz was quick, gabbed at The speed of sound Daz did :
-You're mouth's so huge Muttley, I'm stunned you may also get in your bedroom.
It was Muttley Murphey. And wherever Muttley was, Toothpaste Gibbs was certain to be. Sure enough, she opened wide :
- We'll see 'ow big your mouth is when we tell Ena Sharples you're sledgin' on 'er library books.
I do not know what it was about those 2, but wherever the Cow's Gate Gang went, Toothpaste & Muttley seemed to be already there. What were they doing? They weren't playing girls games, just chewing on the spot, leaning against walls and staring. Now and then they came out with bits of song solely to ridicule the gang, then they'd crack up
laughing. Toothpaste once had all of the boys on bikes in the village follow her as she probably did a ride thru in blue eye shade and her mum's gold earrings. Her long black hair was always stuck in her eyes and on the greasy side. She was wearing long cardigans down to her knees and called all boys "buster". We never admitted it, but we'd have all been in love with her if it weren't for Muttley.

Muttley was her inseperable "gaurd dog", tall and lankey with 6 siblings. Muttley wore her hair in a bun like her ma and her great dishevelled dungarees made her look like her old man. She suspected she was special just because she lived opposite Milky White, but he called them the Steptoes, and Muttley the Nag. We couldn't get near them for lip, and they both ran like the clappers anyhow.

Just then, Milky appears at the end of his path with a duffle bag his mother had embroidered library books on.
-Look at 'im, Daz announced. Taking his books up the laundrette first.
-The Whites've got a washing machine, Muttley claimed. I am able to see your mother aint even though yer name is a packet o' soap powder.
-What's which make 'im then, White Spirit ? I announced thumbing at Milky who was passing under the streetlamp like the only boy in the world.
-I'll tell you two what that makes 'im
And that is's when she dropped her bombshell. I will tell you what she announced in Episode eight, coming soon to under a streetlamp near you.

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