Online Dating and the Basics to Stay Safe

The Web has become the hot new place for smart, eligible people to find romance, and those looking for love are swarming into cyberspace. As a result, many individuals have begun relationships online with people they have not met and know little about.

With so many people communicating via the Net and deciding to go out with virtual strangers, it is critical to be safe and be smart. Use your common sense. Check out these basic rules to make sure you are safe:

All that glitters is not necessarily gold.
Start slow by using email or chat channels. Watch out for weird behavior or inconsistent pattern as you communicate online. If someone is evasive, this is a red flag. "Pay attention" to your correspondent's words. Always keep in mind that the other party might not be what they say they are. Have faith in your instincts. If it does not feel right at the beginning, walk away.

Do the CIA check and get as much info as you can.
Learn to ask many questions. Find out where he grew up, where she works, and how he is connected to his community. You will be like Columbo trying to find out a person's profile. Be suspicious, if someone is unwilling to reveal any personal identifying information. Try to look for discrepancies as they tell you their life story. If your correspondent is unwilling to answer your questions, this is another red flag. Continue with a great deal of caution.

It is best to be honest from the get go.
Represent yourself accurately. Exaggerating or deceiving is easy on the web. Areas to be particularly careful about are marital status and physical appearance. Begin with a request for a picture and send them a recent one of you. If someone is unwilling to send a recent photo, this is warning sign. If he or she continuously comes up with an excuse, it is because that person has something to hide. Having a scanned photo is easily available, so there is no valid excuse for not doing it. When you have each other's pics, continue to get more info so that both side will have an accurate total picture. Honesty is the best policy as your grandma always say.

Talk on the phone and continue to learn more about your correspondent.
Talking reveals valuable information about a person's personality and quirks. It is worth the cost of the call to protect your security. But do not give out your phone number to a stranger. Trust takes time to develop. Only when you feel completely comfortable should you furnish your phone number.

Take your time, take your time.
Meeting someone online and then arranging a date in a relatively short time can be unsafe. Take time to find out who this person really is. If someone is pressuring you to get together before you are ready, this is another warning sign. If something feels strange as you get to know this person, then it is time to back away and look for another match.

If there are no red flags and you decide to meet, just proceed with care and dictate the terms of the first meeting. Try to follow these tips to ensure your safety:

1. Make sure a friend or anyone close to you knows where you are going and when you will be back from this first date. Leave your date's full name and telephone numbers with that person and write it down. There are also websites these days, like smartdatedotcom, where you can register dating information such as these, for a small fee. If your first date wants to keep things confidential, then, big red flag! Time to walk away. Your safety above all else!
2. Keep the location of the first date in a public place. Stay near other people in a lighted area. Getting together for coffee is a pleasant, casual way to get to know someone.
3. Never allow yourself to be picked up from your house. Giving your address out to a stranger is not safe. Arrange your own transportation so that you can leave if there is any sign of trouble.
4. Pay attention to everything that this person has told you about him or herself. This is like an audit, it you find he lied online, move on.
5. For the same reason you do not want to be picked up at home on the first date, do not let him drop you off. Remember that you are out with almost a virtual stranger. Use the same kind of common sense and rules that you would use in any type of dating relationship.

Be smart and be safe. Be in control. Always think ahead before you invest your time and emotion on this exercise. Information about the other person is the key!

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