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The Blame Game - How Can Unhealthy Relationships Be Restored?

By: Anna Kounago

People expect to be happy in a relationship. If arguments break out, they assume the partner is responsible. Relationships can end easily with this sort of thinking.

Both partners want the other one to set things right. But the partners themselves make excuses about their own behavior based on the other's behaviors. Both eventually believe they are personally innocent, and the other had caused the rift.

With the couple insisting that they are not responsible for their behaviors, can a counselor make any difference? According to him, "I slept with another woman because you are no longer interested in sex".From her perspective, "I don't want to have the type of emotionless and loveless sex you want"

This exchange of "you, you" becomes a regular game. It doesn't take much for this to become very tiring. Eventually, I get called in as their therapist.

As a therapist, these are some things that can be done. A simple reminder of how their marriage can be healthy is good:

? Couples respect each other's feelings. If I am hurt by words or actions of my partner, I chose to upset myself. Couples can chose not to be hurt by little things.
? If you have been with your partner for more than three months, you are meant to be together. Both of you play your part in your marital troubles.
? Your partner cannot change you and vice versa. If your partner doesn't listen to your suggestions, stop trying. To keep things good, you need to do what you can.
? Whenever a couple argues with one side thinking they are right, it ends up with both being wrong.

This Blame Game just creates helplessness in partners. If you are the blamer, you are actually claiming you have all-power over your partner's feelings.

If this goes on, the relationship will turn into a parent-child relationship where the child's feelings can get hurt easily and the parent must always be cautious.

Or even worst, its more like two children playing "grown-ups" and pretending to have a relationship.

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Folks that encounter matrimony troubles are usually afraid to take into account professional spousal relationship advice programs. Anna Kounago will be pleased to resolve difficulties of fresh and old husbands and wives that think there isn't any answer to the problem. Rescue your own loving relationship as well as add romance in your marriage! Stop by happy marriage site to be able to receive guidance.

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